Extra Schmaltz!

This dish is from Brazil, where it is often served after a heavy, meat-laden churrasco meal (primarily to tourists), with the idea that the papain enzyme will help dissolve the pile of meat you just consumed. Don't know if it works, but it is definitely delicious. Typically it is made with vanilla ice cream to a pudding-like consistency, but I like this lighter, zingier, smoothie version. 1 c. ripe papaya chunks 1 c. plain yogurt 2-3 Tbsp. sugar 1-2 Tbsp. crème de cassis or Ribena 1 pinch salt 1/4 milk (optional) Wait until your paypaya is super-duper ripe--I wait until it is on the verge of developing mold and attracting an armada of fruit flies. Peel it and take off some flesh with the peel to get rid of the bitter outer edge. Cut into chunks. I get the big red papayas from the Mexican grocery, but you can use the smaller pear-shaped ones too. Blend together the papaya, yogurt, sugar, salt, and a dash of the  crème de cassis. Add the milk if you want it to be a smoothi

I received a request to share my fried rice recipe, written for a kitchen beginner. There are a lot of subtleties for making awesome fried rice, which would make it a lot easier to teach in-person; this step-by-step is the next best thing. I'm going to shout a bit in this post, but listen to me if you want your rice to fulfill your every hope and dream! TWO KEY THINGS YOU MUST HAVE: LEFTOVER rice (at least one night in the fridge, ideally a few days old). If you try to make it with fresh rice it will be mushy.  A BIG-ASS non-stick pan. Don't try to be a cowboy with cast iron or some other shiz. I am serious--if you are a beginner, DO NOT PASS GO without fulfilling those requirements or you will be disappointed and frustrated and never try cooking again. For rice I recommend a long-grain Thai jasmine rice, but other types will work. If you don't have a GOOD non-stick pan, I recommend Swiss Diamond . If you are concerned about carcinogens or whatever tin-foil hat b